Up and down, up and down,
My moods they flutter up and down.
Approval granted for such variation
Doesn’t change the disappointed soul.
Happy yet sad, confused yet clear
I understand that you are not here
Life does go on, it has done, you’ve seen
Yet the grief attacks months after the scene.
Lows and highs, I feel them all
Powerful actions that cut through the heart
Warming or cooling depending upon
The aim of the attack thus far.
Freedom, I long for, my moods can’t sustain
The fluctuation of chemicals in my brain
Overthinking yet vacant, nothing in the stare
Nothing gazed upon either, now you’re not there.